Ten Skills That Will Transform You From Being A Good Networker To A Great One

Networking is not merely shaking hands and distributing business cards. Networking is really about building relationships, developing them and, most importantly maintaining them. It is the building of your social capital that really speaks if you are cut out for networking and do you have it in you to become a good networker.

What Makes A Good Networker?

Is networking really for you? Good networkers have a lot of things in common. That's not to say that anybody can't be a good networker - but if you're lacking some of these skills or traits and you are still committed to networking, you will have to work a little harder to attain the success you want.

All networkers will have these ten characteristics in some measure, but if you develop them to the utmost, they will transform from being a good networker to an outstanding one.

1. Assertive.

Networkers are reach-out people. They are people who are always eager to meet other people. They are comfortable in gatherings and also comfortable with themselves. They create a mutual admiration society, they like people and people like them. Moreover they are not afraid to initiate contacts.

2. Good Communication Skills.

Networkers are good verbal and written communicators. They can translate ideas into both easy-to-read and easy-to-understand language. They can put their thoughts into words quickly. They tend to use shorter words, shorter sentences and shorter paragraphs to get their point across.

3. Good Listener Skills.

In addition to being able to communicate in an outgoing manner, networkers have to be skilled in the reverse situation and be good listeners. Remembering that networking is a connecting system, the communications forces are two-way. For assertive people, the tendency is often to talk to, rather than to talk with. When you want something from somebody you have to listen to them very carefully. How they say something might be just as important as what they say.

4. Inquisitive.

Rudyard Kipling wrote, "I have five servants, tried and true. Their names are what and when and where and why and who." A good starting point for net-workers, but you must go beyond Kipling's five questions. You have to be inquisitive about people, places, situations and things. How do you network with things? Well, you really don't, but things often lead you to special people.

If, for instance, you read a particularly interesting book or see an exciting new product, you may want to network with the author, inventor or supplier of the new publication or product.

5. An Avid Reader.

The International Paper Company studied the reading habits of 100 young business people who were members of management training programs and considered likely to become executives, found that these people read an average of three magazines and twelve newspapers a week. An identical survey among 100 company vice-presidents between the ages of 45 and 50 found, that in a single week, these busy people found time to read three and a half magazines and 15 newspapers.

Similar studies show that successful architects, teachers, scientists, salespeople and politicians read more than their less successful counterparts. The point we make here is that as networkers keep on reading, their careers will move upward.

6. Honest.

In networking it's the often small nuances of honesty that can play a key role. Do you exaggerate? Do you keep your promises? Do you make promises you can't keep? Do you respect confidences? Do you gossip - using information from your network? Do you bribe? Even though any of us may unintentionally slip into one of these situations, the penalties are high. Getting caught can destroy some or your entire valuable network. The news of misdeeds seems to travel through networks faster than the news of good deeds.

7. Creative.

Creativity plays an enormously important role in networking. It applies to finding people and information, to problem solving, to research, to promoting yourself, to unusual uses of the tools of networking, and to organizing and refining the network you've built.

Many people believe that you are born creative, but we challenge that notion. We believe that just as people exercise their muscles and become stronger, you can exercise you brain and become more creative.

Some people look at something and see only its surface. Others look at the same thing and see something of value or potential value. One person looks at a chocolate chip cookie and sees so meting to eat. Another looks at the cookie and sees the opportunity for a new business.

People can learn to be more creative. If s not an overnight phenomenon, but like the adage goes "Inch by inch, anything's a cinch." Progress may initially be slow, but eventually you will learn.

8. Generous.

To be successful, networking has to be a combination of both giving and getting. Giving does not merely mean giving something in return for something or repaying a favor - giving of your own free will. In his book, Try Giving Yourself Away, David Dunn describes the event that led to his achieving a "giving himself away" lifestyle. The book grew out of an article with the same title that appeared anonymously in Forbes magazine and was also reprinted in an abbreviated version in Reader's Digest.

While making one of his monthly trips on the Twentieth Century Limited, a famous New York to Chicago train of by gone days, Dunn wondered where the New York bound and Chicago bound trains passed in the night. It occurred to him that this "passing" had the makings of an intriguing advertisement. For Dunn, this wasn't just an idle thought - he acted upon it.

He wrote to the New York Central Lines and gave them the idea with no strings attached. Soon he received a letter with the information that the trains were scheduled to pass near a small town nine miles west of Buffalo.

Later he received another letter telling him that the railroad was going to use his idea for a picture on their next calendar. The headline would be; "Where the Centuries Pass," the photo showed the trains passing in the night. And the rest is history. The calendar was widely distributed in both this country and in Europe, and to collectors of railroading memorabilia it's a prized possession.

David Dunn, having reaped so much pleasure from giving things away, devoted the rest of his life to giving himself away. You too, can and should try giving yourself away. You can give with small acts as well as things. A piece of information, a small courtesy, a recipe, a greeting card, a magazine clipping...all are without monetary value but all are cherished by the recipient.

9. Disciplined.

There's that word from our definition, disciplined acquaintanceship. We don't use the word discipline in its harshest sense, but rather as a combination of several words - perhaps words like organized, active and assertive. Disciplined networkers make a habit of updating and organizing the names in their network. They work at networking every day. They are assertive in their contacts; there is nothing passive about disciplined networkers. They keep good records and use the many tools available to them.

10. Good Natured.

Yes, networking is serious business. Yes, you do it to achieve success. But we sincerely believe that networking should be a fun process. With some networkers there is a sense of personal seriousness, often coupled with a sense of urgency that becomes a turn-off.